11th Official Blog Post in AU. 1 December 2011
I read this blog post of my dear friend Mckenzie just after writing Isolation. and it really confirmed some thoughts from earlier that day. I just love witnessing the marriage she and David have. What seems to set them apart, aside from their obvious love for the Lord Jesus, is their attitude.
Any girl can write a blog about her life.
Any girl can talk about marriage.
But Mckenzie’s outlook on her life and marriage is what makes all the difference!
So many people in my general age group seem to get choked up with fear at the thought of marriage, loving someone fully, and allowing someone else to love them without feeling indebted or under conditions. Understandably so considering the divorce rate and dysfunctions of today’s modern family. At the same time, I think our relationships would be much healthier if we would stop allowing fear to rule over us and the decisions we make within our relationships!
- Run away from relationships because they include challenges. Nobody wants struggles when we constantly hear Hollywood preach that everything should happen easily and flawlessly; life is lived happily ever after... Roll credits. That’s a wrap.
- Run away because we are too comfortable with ourselves and fear the unpredictability of a relationship. Can you trust this person with your heart? How can you be sure? Do you really want to invest the time and energy this relationship would require? Especially when you have had your heart broken before. It is so easy to revert back to what experience has led us to believe. It can seem even easier to live for ourselves only.
As my last post encouraged: we need each other!
Also, life is done better together. Why? Partnership and community were God’s ideas!
Be reasonable about picking your partner.
S/he may not be a super model or celebrity, s/he may not have perfectly airbrushed features, but can s/he do life with you on days you feel like less than a champion? Is s/he the kind of person who will love you when you are not squeaky clean? Will this person empower you to walk victoriously into all the the desires you know God has purposed for your life and see you through to its entirety? Do they carry the same conviction of commitment that you hold? Most divorces are a result of poor communication– how do you two communicate?
I know that last paragraph sounds so noble, structured and optimistic, but you come to know those things about people in the seemingly mundane details of every day life. While marriage will be an adventure, it may not be the kind of epic you envision it to be.
In the midst of what seems like a situation that counters the American Dream, Mckenzie says,
“I love loving David. It blesses my heart, it gives me so much joy. It makes life so beautiful in the midst of the trials and tribulations that come our way... They have given us new eyes for one another, and I couldn’t be more thankful. I know this is going to be a time we’re going to look back on and remember as such a blessing. Though my heart definitely aches for the time we’re out of this valley!”
Through and through, her post gives me so much joy. Though they could easily turn on each other out of fear and stress, they cling to God’s promises and, as a result, are tightly bound to one another and filled with the joy of the Lord for strength.
Wow! Finishing up the passage in Ecclesiastes fits like a puzzle piece– how appropriate (and entirely unplanned):
Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
But how can one keep warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.
Make God that center strand and He will give you the strength to maintain a simply joyful attitude in the midst of struggles. In His love, you are able to love another with more depth and longevity than you think you are capable of.
Here’s to a reasonable kind of love. In a world of hype, instant gratification, an “all about me” attitude and short attention spans– may we love unconditionally and faithfully to no end like He first loved us.
NOTE: For the record to any speculation out there (aka my friends or family), NO I am not ready to get married; this attitude is based on season not on emotions or fear. I am a content single–thankyouverymuch– who would be equally content with a “one-step-at-a-time” level of progress. This is NOT an advertisement! Only a clarification. :)