I'm not sure what to write here.
So much has been invading my mind these last two weeks... a refreshing change to my thoughtlessness over the past few months.
I wish so many things right now...
But I know that all I really need is to trust in one Heavenly Father-
Who knows who I really am though I haven't always been true in front of other people,
Him who makes me worthy of something greater and beyond my faults though I don't deserve a second, third, fifty millionth chance at doing things right.
He is someone who loves me to no end even though my understanding of love has been tarnished by this world and I struggle to receive His affection.
I want to be free in the understanding that He is God and I am not.
I want to trust Him with all of me because He actually knows my days: past, present, and future.
As if I actually understand what he has laid out in front of me in the coming days/months/years...
Letting go of control makes me feel light as a feather,
Yet my hands are aching to clench something I long for.
If we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
I have no direction for my life except that scripture above and this one below:
Let love and faithfulness never leave you.
God use me to pour into the beautiful people you have surrounded my life with... don't let me take time for granted for we are but a mist, here today gone tomorrow.
May I remain in your Spirit so that I might be a blessing to others.
I don't want to waste my life by witholding Your love in my life from other people.
In Jesus Name,